Should I tell my (20m) gf (20f) of 4 years about my panic and deep rooted insecurities or work through it myself?

2021.10.23 10:16 ThrowRa104401 Should I tell my (20m) gf (20f) of 4 years about my panic and deep rooted insecurities or work through it myself?

TLDR; I (20m) had a panic attack while using cannabis and deep realization of my inner securities. Tell my gf (20f) or work through it myself?
Hi all. Last night was very revealing for me. I was very high and ended up having an extreme panic attack where my heart was racing and I felt really scared. I ultimately realized a lot of things about myself that I need to work on. Part of the reason I suck at giving her privacy and space for her own life is that deep down I don't love myself and I need to work on that.
I wrongly assume that when she doesn't answer my texts or calls for a while it's because she is busy, and that she doesn't want to talk to me. She is under more anxiety and stress than I understood, and last night I realized how debilitating that can be, and I feel horrible for not understanding what she was going through previously. I need help learning to give her more space to herself. I also need to learn to do more things and meet more people in my own life. I am not really that happy and I want to change that.
Not to mention we are long distance (we are both in school right now), for the past two years, so that makes the relationship difficult as it is.
To make a long story short, there are things that I need to personally do in order to grow as a person. She has a lot on her plate as it is, and I don't know if I should open up to her about all of this or simply work on it myself. Thank you very much for any advice.
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